ONE HUG AT A TIME

One hug and one "goodbye" was all it took for the tears to fill my eyes as I said goodbye to my favorite little people. I have always looked forward to the day I got to move into my own apartment and start my life as a college student, but I never thought of how it would feel to say goodbye to the kids I call mine. Being their "big sister" these past five years has changed my whole world! Having three littles around me all the time that look up to me and trust me has made want to be better!

About a month ago I said goodbye to my three little loves. As I hugged my Scouter Bug, her little lip started to quiver

and tears filled her eyes as I told her how much I loved her. This chick has been my very best friend and side kick since November 25th, five years ago. Having dance parties, karaoke late nights, sleep overs, movie nights, and shopping dates with her has brought us so close! For the first few years of her life she thought we were sisters! Now when I tell her she just says, "Kinley, we are not real sisters! We are pretend sisters! But all of my friends think I am your little sister." That's how close we are!

She notices even the little things I do and continually imitates me which has taught me how to be a good example to her. She looks up to me and she is the reason I try to better myself each and every day. She loves watching me put on my makeup and do my hair and constantly tries to do hers the same way. She really notices everything I do! Whenever I leave her she puts on her puppy dog face and I ALWAYS end up staying at least another thirty minutes, cause who could say no to that face?! Everyday I get to watch her learn and grow into such a strong independent little lady! I take the credit for her sassy little spirit because I truly believe it comes from me haha! She constantly reminds me how much she loves me and how much I love her which is one of my favorite things! We often have contests to prove the that I love her more and vise versa. This goodbye truly was the very hardest. My little BFF has changed my world!

My Buddy Boy didn't really understand that I was leaving. I hugged him and immediately started crying. He looked a little worried and when I asked him if he was scared of me crying he replied with a slow up and down head nod. Jex is my little man and I constantly get asked if he's my son! Of course I lie and say that he is because he's too cute not take the credit for. I was so excited when I found out that he was coming into this world! I knew we'd be inseparable, and I was right! He never fails to make me smile with that contagious little laugh of his! He comes to sit with me every week in church and lets me read to him and color pictures with him. He can be the craziest kid yet the kindest most loving one all at the same time!! He never fails to give me his "Big Bud Hugs" before we say goodbye. He is the sweetest thing and is the BEST cuddle buddy I've ever had. He melts my heart!

Lastly I said goodbye to my Roe Bug. She is my little piece of heaven on earth! I was lucky enough to be the first non-family member to hold her the day she was born. She also gets mistaken as my child and yet again I take credit for her cuteness because why not? She's too cute not to pretend she's mine!! This sweet girl I wasn't able to be with as much as the other two which makes me so sad! But in those 9 months I have been able to spend with her, I soak up every little bit I get with my little piece of heaven. The last few weeks we all have developed some new nicknames for this skinny mini! We now call her Jack-Jack because she looks EXACTLY like Jack-Jack from the Incredibles, and Scooter because she scoots everywhere! I've grown to love this little human more and more each day as I see her learn new things which really get her excited! She loves rolling over, playing peak-a-boo, scooting ALL over the place, and she has the most beautiful smile! Her smile and laugh lights up my world! She is the sweetest most smiley little girl ever and I love being her big sis!

The best gift I've ever received was being able to be their big sis all these years. They've taught me more than I could've ever taught them. They made me realize even more than I already did how much I wanted to be a mom. They taught me patience, how to nurture, play, and love with all my heart! I will forever be in debt to these little munchkins who raised me as much as I raised them. The second best gift I ever received was a book of photos of my little loves! They were so excited to give it to me and sat on my lap as we flipped through the pages. It was the best goodbye present I could've ever asked for because it was full of all the memories we shared together. I love these kids with my whole heart!! This post is a little late because it took so much out of me to write this and I could never find the right words. Emotions were flying everywhere as I was thinking back to the day I said goodbye. But sometimes when you close a door, you open an even bigger one. And I know no matter where I am, I know they will always be with me. Marco polo really helps with our long distance chats;)